Five Minute Friday: AFRAID (Christians have Panic Attacks)

Posted: February 1, 2013 in Faith, Family, Five Minute Friday
Tags: , , ,

AFRAID

start . . . 

My first thought when I read this word is singing Steve Green’s song, “When I am afraid I will trust in You“, many times by Jessica’s bed, both in the hospital and afterwards.  When she went into heart failure a few years ago, it was while she was trying to go to sleep.  She could not breath well.  Her chest was hurting.  And she began to cough.  Thankfully were in a hotel that was in the hospital – for an early appointment the next morning – but not for her heart.  It was for her spinal defects.  Little did we know how God was orchestrating her spinal problems to save her life- to be at the hospital at the precise moment she needed to be.  

Yet, for many months afterwards, she had a very hard time going to sleep.  She was afraid it was going to happen again.  What if?  We prayed by her bed.  We’d sing.  We’d try different distractions.  We even had to get a prescription to help her.  She’d get herself so worked up.  There were even a couple times we took her to the hospital because we just could not take chances.  Sometimes now even years later, it still hits her.  She’s kinda like her mama . . .

Fears and panics . . .  being afraid can become quite gripping.  I know.  I deal at times with panic attacks. Sometimes they hit me so out of the blue.  It happened last weekend- at a retreat I was so looking forward to – getting away.  And then some unpredictable things happened and I did not know people and it caught me so off guard. It’s not a matter of just praying it off or snapping out of it. I had to get away and calm down – which meant, leaving the retreat which was very discouraging for me.  And I am sure it was misread.  And then it makes me want to avoid more…  Ugh….

. . . finished 

I did not know what today’s word was going to be until 5+ minutes ago, or even where my writing would trail off to.  It was a difficult time last weekend . . . embarrassing  hurting time, yet thankful for friends who care and love.  It had been many months since I had a panic attack – and I know God can heal this too and I am thankful that I am . . . 

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Joining Lisa-Jo and her Five Minute Friday.
” five minutes of free writing without worrying about getting it right “

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Comments
  1. I am so grateful you wrote so sincerely of your situation. I have chronic depression and sometimes my Christian friends are the last people I would tell about it. Isn’t that sad? Your willingness to be transparent here makes me feel better and more likely, next time, to speak up when I need help. Your little one is blessed to have you as her Mommy.

  2. I see so much bravery in you. The way you write of the trials with your daughter. The way you reveal the honest hurting parts and embarrassment. That is not the tone of someone cowardly or overtaken. That is the voice of a brave woman. I have struggled/still struggle with severe depression and anxiety at times and I know that it can seem so discouraging and I don’t have any quick tips or prayers to get you out of it, but I do know that God is in control of it all, and He has purposed you for great things. Even if it is in the telling of where your hope lies. Thank you for sharing so honestly.

  3. Barbie says:

    I love your raw honesty here. I’ve dealt with depression in the past. I had to be careful who I talked to about it, because those in my immediate circle just assumed it was a spiritual issue. Today I don’t struggle near as much, and am praying and believing for your healing!

  4. Lizzy says:

    Thank you for your honesty here. You are in no way alone in feeling like this.

  5. Mia says:

    H dear Loni
    Yes, dear friend, we get those moments of intense fear and living in the world today gives us more than enough reason too. When that nasty monster is trying to suffocate me, I always remind myself that our Lord Jesus already overcame the world. Thanks for sharing such honesty and that at FMF! It is encouraging to know that you are not the only one!
    Much love
    Mia

  6. keltrinswife says:

    I love your honesty and I am sure it will help others! It seems so taboo to talk about depression/panic attacks–just pray some say. Well, sometimes it takes more than prayer. You go girl–sharing this. Be blessed:)

  7. Yes, we have panic attacks. Me, too. Struggling through a new season of the dark right now, and I was glad to read even your blog title today. Sisterhood.

  8. Well I wish I could say I don’t know what you are talking about … but I do.
    And if nothing else it has been an amazing way to see Him provide…
    because panic is truly you at the end of you… a perfect testimony to watch Him work.
    T

  9. Vicki says:

    Your honesty is touching. I dealt with pretty bad anxiety when my husband diagnosed with cancer. It’s a terrible and scary feeling. Thank you for being so honest.

  10. It takes courage to write about this stuff for the world to see. Lots of people don’t understand panic unless they have experienced it, and as Christians, some people also like to judge fear or panic saying we who have panicked don’t have enough faith. It is a very real , and intense feeling though. I understand! Blessings to you, and thanks for having the courage to share. Don’t be discouraged that you had to leave or worry about how it looked. You have to take care of you in these situations, and that is ok.

  11. Oh, my heart palpitates just thinking about this, Loni. all of it.
    we’re called to extend grace, and I am trusting that is what you received from those at the retreat. For who are we to judge the trials and thorns in another’s life.
    Some seem to forget that though we become Christian, that doesn’t mean we transform into angels! we have to deal with what this world throws our way just like everyone else. including panic attacks! {HUGS} to you, Loni. Thank you for sharing your heart for His glory today!

  12. My heart goes out to you, Loni…you are brave and I am grateful you shared…you are not alone, dear one…I pray that the other ladies at the retreat will extend compassion and understanding to you.

  13. […] Five Minute Friday: AFRAID (Christians have Panic Attacks) […]

  14. Charyse says:

    Thank you for sharing this. So often, I have avoided situations or conversations out of anxiety. Too many times I have been curled up in bed instead of up and about taking care of my family because of depression. The Lord has been good to begin the healing process in me but so often I still battle the enemy in these areas. Too many people see an anxious person as standoffish and a depressed person as lazy. Thank you for sharing your struggles with us!

  15. […] such fear that I can barely breath by the time the one I am waiting on gets home (yes . . . those anxiety attacks so many responded to before).   It’s remembering […]

  16. Jason Walker says:

    Thank you so much for posting this! As a Christian, I’ve often felt too ashamed and like my faith was weak or like I didn’t pray enough because of my panic attacks. People who don’t have them don’t understand, but you’re very right when you say it’s not a matter of praying them away. Sometimes I, too, have to just get away and calm down. I’ve been offered an incredible opportunity to attend graduate school at a great university with a prestigious program. I am traveling there next weekend to meet the faculty and other students. I am terribly afraid that I will have one of those moments where I need to just get away. It won’t be that easy and I need to be there the entire time. If you are so inclined, please do pray for me and I will do the same for you. Thank you again for understanding!

  17. […] Five Minute Friday: AFRAID (Christians have Panic Attacks) (writingcanvas.wordpress.com) […]

  18. […] people.  I don’t do Black Friday shopping.  Too many people.  I can even have a panic attack being at a ladies retreat – with a crowd of women, not knowing where I fit in or who to sit […]

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